Why it Works: A Story About Medical Emergencies

My editor’s take on one well-crafted story

Every now and then I analyze a nonfiction article that impressed me, zeroing in on why it works by focusing on several of the Fundamental Elements of a Good Story. This week’s story is one I edited on Medium (the “friend link” bypasses the paywall). I encourage you to go read the story, consciously evaluate it yourself, then come back and see what you think of my take.

Headline: Subtle Signs of Medical Emergencies: Insights from an ER Nurse

Subtitle: Some serious or life-threatening conditions don’t look like obvious emergencies. Recognizing these symptoms could save your life or that of a loved one.

Lede: Some medical emergencies are obvious. Profuse bleeding from a stab wound or severe crushing chest pain, for example. Other medical emergencies have far more subtle symptoms that might seem minor. A woman in her 40s once came into my ER with what she thought was nothing more than a bad belly ache. By the time she finally decided to get herself to the hospital she was weak and pale. It turned out she had a ruptured aorta that was slowly bleeding into her abdomen.

Author: Andrea Romeo RN, BN

As a reader and an editor, here’s what I like about this story:

The Story Idea: As an ER nurse, Andrea has seen it all. And she has a knack for packaging what she’s seen into stories. It’s not always pretty. In this case, some of the most horrific things you can imagine are rolled into a series of vignettes that you can’t not read, all adding up to making you feel more informed and, just maybe, ready for events you hope will never happen.

Headline: The first half is classic, bullet-proof KISS. The second half establishes authority, makes clear this isn’t a clickbaity listicle.

Subtitle: Provides additional context and solidifies why you should read this story—saving a life—without repeating a single word from the headline.

Lede: Effective anecdote is riveting and concise. We barely have time to get engaged and we’re off to the…

Nutgraph: This 4th graph fully explains what this story is about, the authority of the writer, and why you should read it. Very effective complement to every word that’s come before it, all fully in support of the promise in the headline.

Outline: A simple list. Didn’t need to be more than that. And the subheads are more than labels, adding plain, inviting language to offset the medical jargon and subliminally cue the reader that what’s ahead is readable.

Bottom line: Excellent example of a writer leveraging her expertise to create a list of things that aren’t related until she pulled them together and put a headline over them, and using anecdotes and in-depth research, writing and citations to make it all much more than a list. Her approach serves as an instructional on how to pull a story out of thin air.

Cheers,
Rob